First of all, I want to give some background information on the LDS Church's and BYU's standing on gays in the Church and in general.
This is what the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints says officially: look at lds.org and here and here.
This is what the honor code at BYU-Provo says:
"Brigham Young University will respond to homosexual behavior rather than to feelings or attraction and welcomes as full members of the university community all whose behavior meets university standards. Members of the university community can remain in good Honor Code standing if they conduct their lives in a manner consistent with gospel principles and the Honor Code.
One's stated same-gender attraction is not an Honor Code issue. However, the Honor Code requires all members of the university community to manifest a strict commitment to the law of chastity. Homosexual behavior is inappropriate and violates the Honor Code. Homosexual behavior includes not only sexual relations between members of the same sex, but all forms of physical intimacy that give expression to homosexual feelings."
Basically and overall, homosexuality and bisexuality is still a controversial subject that everyone, no matter who they are, are having to learn about for themselves. We have standards in the Church that go for everyone. Being sexually chaste is very important to us and so that is what we support. PROP 8 and other political and religious movements that the Church supports is in support of chastity and the family unit.
Even though I have had lots of interaction with gays, I have not sat down with someone of gay sexual orientation and asked them questions, so tonight was a great opportunity for me. They had an openly gay man who is married to a woman and has a daughter, a lesbian, a single gay man, and a bisexual man. All are LDS and active in the Church. They started out with telling their stories about when they knew for sure, what they did after they found out, and how they came out. Then they answered questions from the students who were in attendance. They wanted us to not be afraid about asking questions not just at the panel, but with their LGBT friends and family. They truly believed that they were born this way and it wasn't just a "choice."
The thing that stuck out to me the most about Mormons having to deal with being faithful members of the Church while struggling with their sexual orientation is that they all thought that they had failed the Lord as a person. But they all emphasized that they all were at peace with their lives when they realized that their Heavenly Father loves them no matter what. They all said that they grew closer to God and Christ while searching for answers. I whole-heartedly agree with this because I have been there. I haven't had questions about my sexuality, but I have definitely had to deal with other things in my life that not a lot of people understand. But throughout the whole thing, I have never doubted my Heavenly Father's love for me.
I think that homophobia is something that comes from ignorance and fear. Homosexuality is a fairly new thing for a lot of people to deal with, since it has been taboo for so long. I think that there is also issues with retaliation on both sides. There are people who have been categorized as "Christian until homosexuality," where they are Christ-like people until they have to talk about homosexuality. But there are people from the LGBT community who say that people are stupid for not fully supporting who they are. Either way, it is just because not everyone knows everything about everyone else, just like every other controversial issue in this world. My advice would be to talk to people who are homo- or bisexual and ask them questions. Form your own opinion and stick to it. Then love everyone and be Christ-like no matter what.
I agree. I wanted to go tonight but couldn't so thank you for sharing this wonderful experience.
ReplyDeleteWay to go Emily! I wish I was still in the student scene and could have heard about and attended this; but, since I'm not it was nice to get a review. Your take is right on and I applaud you for speaking out on such a controversial issue.
ReplyDeleteI have best friends and extended family that are homosexual and while I do not agree with their actions, it is not my place to judge them as people. All we can do is love them and not treat them differently. They are still best friends and family and that will never change.
I love your last comment: Be Christ-like no matter what.
When Prop 8 was up for a vote, I wrote about it on facebook and got some comments and messages that were scolding me for being a bigot, intolerant and wanting to keep others from being happy. I even got a message saying someone was going to delete me as a friend for the sole reason that I supported Prop 8 and they couldn't be associated in any way with someone who was so close minded. I was called foul names and it was a very interesting experience overall. However, I most impressed by the fact that I was not getting the same respect and freedoms they themselves were fighting for: freedom of speech, freedom to stand up for what I believe in and tolerance. I was not in any way, shape or form removing my "tolerance" of anyone and yet they were being intolerant of me to a horrid degree. It saddened me but also made me realize that some people, not all, but some that cannot even debate this issue fairly.
I am amazed and inspired by those who are active in the church and are openly gay at the same time. They have more willpower than anyone I could imagine and will be respected throughout the eternities if they continue to honor their covenants.
Thanks again for the post and a wonderful new perspective.
I went as well and I also saw you standing by the door. I also enjoyed the fresh perspective.
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